Update CI jobs to include Polars in nightlies and improve IWYU #17306
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Description
This PR adds Polars tests to our nightly runs now that we no longer only fail conditional on certain files changing in PRs. This PR also updates the IWYU jobs to use the version released three days ago, which supports clang 19 like we need. It also fixes a couple of errors in the CMake for how we were setting compile flags for IWYU.
Closes #16383
Checklist